Since I’m Awake Again…Halloween, help please

I’m really starting to get tired of this insomnia thing. Anyway…

Last year I decided what I should be for Halloween:

Since I’m in an electric wheelchair, I want to dress up as a prisoner sitting in an “electric chair”. I know, it’s a wonderful idea. The problem is, I don’t really know how to make the wheelchair look like an electric chair. I think that might be the reason I can’t sleep, so for the sake of my sanity (and my husband and kids wellbeing) I need help figuring this problem out so that I can get some rest.

I know that it is kind of early to be thinking of Halloween costumes, but my brain seems to be stuck on the subject. (I also think of my favorite holiday, April Fools Day, at least a few times a week the entire year. I know… it’s weird). So, if anyone has any ideas for making a wheelchair look like an electric chair, please help me out.

Here is a picture of the chair:

Any ideas appreciated. Thanks!

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11 thoughts on “Since I’m Awake Again…Halloween, help please

  1. Dear Ms. Hobbler, I just posted an overtly Hallowe’en-themed post today, too!

    As a fellow sick-minded individual, I’m sure we can retrofit your Ramp Rover up to specs. First of all, get your hands on a metal collander and attach one of those curly phone cords to it and run the cord into a phoney electrical box you’ve attached to the back of the backrest. If you cannot find a colander that fits properly, find a helmet that has an internal adjustible frame that is the part that comes in contact with the person’s actual head (I think they can be found in construction hard hats or baseball batters’ helmets). Remove and spray paint the liner silver and attach the curly cord to it and run the other end to the “electrical box”. The phoney electical box should have one of those big Y-shaped wooden-handled switches (or a reasonable facsimile) on it.

    See if you can find a set of four of those black plastic (or leather, if you’re into that sort of thing) wrist and ankle weights. You know the ones I mean? They wrap around your appendages and fasten with velcro. If you have ones with straps and buckles, even better! Remove the heavy stuff from inside and run more of the curly phone cord from each of them to the electrical box. You’ll also have to find some kind of prison-looking garb, like a grey t-shirt and sweatpants with stripes and/or a prisoner number painted on.

    OK. This is what’s going to really put your costume over the top! If you have a friend that’s an electrician, have him/her build you a very small eletrical grill that is maybe a couple of inches square and powered by a battery other than the one on your wheelchair. Or you could get one of those incense burners like they use in Orthodox churches (I think the Catholics use them, too) and some special charcoal. At the party, throw a tiny little bit of bacon on the heat source and let it burn. The smell will be sickening and is exactly like the odour found in the execution chamber when they carry out the sentence on prisoners who have been marinating themselves in maple syrup and hickory.

    Best of luck and happy Hallowe’en! Don’t forget to post pictures of you in your costume!

    • Those are all great ideas. I have ankle weights already, but I hadn’t thought of using the phone cords. I had thought of using a colander on my head, but I have a pretty small head…I think a spray-painted helmet might be a better fit. I don’t know about the whole bacon thing…I’m probably just going to be rolling around the neighborhood and knocking on doors. I don’t want my kids to be forbidden from neighbor’s houses because of the smelly memories. (By the way, how do you know about the odor in the execution chamber? I have a wierd family too, but not that weird). It might be fun to take a few sparklers or maybe put some glow sticks in the helmet and ankle cuffs. I think I can find a prisoner costume when I look for costumes for my kids. Anyway, great suggestions. I can start gathering supplies and planning my lines (I’ve got to think of a phrase to say when they come to the door). Thanks for your help.

      • Well, you’re right…the bacon idea is a bit over the top but that’s my style (check out my recent The Other Way of Quitting bit for more extreme solutions to employment problems).

        The sparklers are a great idea! How about “High-voltage Hallowe’en!” for a greeting line?

  2. An other Idea. Know the movia Wild Wild West? Why don’t go like the bad gay. He dind’t have legs, but was a metal spider.

    Just block the lower part of your wheel chair and paint there different legs. Or pretend you don’t have legs at all. Just make it look like you’re lowerbody is cut of. Just angain put cardboard below your waste and put a board against your waste, all bloody ect..

    Here we don’t celibrate Halloween, so I hope I have the right vision. 🙂

    Sophie

    • Those are great ideas! I think I am going to do the electric chair this year, but one of those will probably be next year’s costume. I guess I could also use one for April Fools Day too. Thanks!

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