I almost forgot to tell you…

You all do know that it is April Fools Day right? Just wondering. You also know that this is my favorite holiday…better than Christmas, right? I’ve talked about it for the past year. I’ve thought about it for the past few months, and I started grooming you about a month ago.

I know…it is horrible. The thing is, I have had so many wonderful heart-felt comments about secrets, and sharing things, and understanding and loving no matter what. I almost started hoarding just so I wouldn’t hurt anyone’s feelings. I’m sorry I am not really a hoarder. I am addicted to prescription medication if that makes you feel better. Also, everything I’ve said in the comments is true in one way or another.

I also enjoy the show Hoarders, and I always feel sympathetic toward the people on it. It is a devastating thing for the individual and the family of a real hoarder. Definitely not joking material, although, I thought it would be fun for a blog because you can’t actually see my house…

I’m sorry, okay! I didn’t expect people to care so much. I now know that I can trust all of you with my deepest, darkest secrets. I guess you might not feel like you can trust me, but you can…usually. Just not around April. I hope you will forgive me and love me anyway. You’ve got to admit it is funny though…

Okay, it’s not funny…it’s bad…horrible…you all have been up all night losing sleep over the possibility of something that is actually destroying my life, and it is a joke. Sorry, how many times do I have to say it? I love you all. I will not do anything like this for at least a year, but really, everything I say on this day should not be trusted.

Except this. Telling people I fooled them. That can be trusted. Thanks, and sorry again.

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44 thoughts on “I almost forgot to tell you…

    • I am sorry, really I almost gave up on the whole thing because people were being way too compassionate. This is kind of the meanest one I have ever done, but I was not trying to be mean at all. You are all just way too nice. Thanks for understanding, and I really did mean everything I said in the comments. I do definitely have areas in my house I should clean out, but nothing like hoarders…well, maybe the desk. I hate paperwork.

      • Well, the clincher to the whole set-up was that you posted a few days ago that you had some “deep dark secret” that was bothering you.

        I can take a joke with the best of ’em. I think it was well planned and a success.

        And with living with a pack rat (she’s not passed into the definition of a hoarder… yet), the idea about scanning some stuff to store on disc is great! Definitely will help around here. So your prank had some good with it.

        • I’ve really been hinting around for about a month. I just wanted it to be believable, and I didn’t think you would buy it if I just suddenly said “I’m a hoarder” today. I really feel guilty though. I almost called the whole thing off after the responses to that deep, dark secret post. People just have completely renewed my faith in a lot of humanity. For people to be so sympathetic to someone they have never physically met, and to be so loving and understanding, is not what my cynical self expected. So, I guess that is another good thing.

          • LOL.. I know what you mean. I have made many good friends here in the WP community. More so than my local friends. But that’s because my WP friends and I have something in common.. .blogging and typically similar interests – because that’s how we find one another. So makes sense. My local friends are not the geek like I am.

      • And honestly, what I really want to say to hoarders and pack rats is that I’m happy to come over and start cleaning out for you. I really cannot stand such attachments to “things.” Sentimental is fine. But just “things” in general. Nope. It is very easy for me to toss it away or donate what is donate-able. Easy. Especially as tired as I’ve been the past year… that’s less I have to dust and clean.

        • Yeah, I don’t actually have much of a problem tossing stuff, I think the biggest thing is paperwork. I hate to file, and my husband has his own business, so it is just a lot to deal with. The mental fog from the medications or fatigue makes that difficult too. I also really like my kids toys. I still can throw them out, but I like them to like the ones that are my favorite. Legos are always fun to play with them with. I’m not so into Barbies. 😉

          • Lego’s are awesome! I’m with you on paperwork. It gets tossed into a stack in a drawer until the drawer gets too full. Then I’m forced to filter and file – which I’m very near that point now. Especially after all the medical bills which have been rolling in… and sitting.

    • Thanks, I feel a little sick about the whole thing though. People were just opening up so much. It kind of restored my faith in humanity though. I just hope I didn’t offend anyone.

  1. Hobbles! 😐

    I have just spent 30 minutes constructing a response to that! Just aswell you don’t like Christmas as you’re off my Xmas card list!

    I had no idea it ws 1st April as I’ve been blind drunk for the past 3 days. Grrr….

    Revenge is a dish best served very cold….watch your back Hobbles!

    • You are so funny. You don’t have to feel bad for talking about the hoarding. Even though I’m not actually a hoarder, I feel like I feel like I understand them. Anyway, I’ll write more on your other post, I’m just using my phone, and I need a real computer to really write of it, but sorry. I almost called the whole thing off, but it was a little too late at that point.

      I understand why you don’t want to send me a Christmas card. I am also fearfully delighted at the thought of revenge. I didn’t even think about that possibility, and now it is exciting to me. I love pranks, even if they are on me sometimes. You know, I don’t know why, but there is something about you…we are meant to be blogging friends, and I will anxiously await me slow annihilation at your skilled hands.

      By the way, I hope you had a great weekend. I know you were drunk, but that is half the fun right? I thought of stopping by your blog several times to just say hi and to see if you were alive. I did look at it every day I think. My point is, I’m glad you are back. How is your cat doing? I thought of her as well…that might be creepy…but let’s just go with concerned friend rather than obsessed stalker.

    • People here are so wonderful. I almost called the whole joke off because everyone was so caring and there was so much love an understanding. I really hope I don’t lose any of the intimacy between all of the commenters, since it was a joke. It is still good advice for anyone.

      • I haven’t had time to write much (as I told you a couple of comments ago) so I’ve been creating a bunch of drafts with a couple of ideas jotted down therein and adding a couple of words at a time. I started my own April Fool’s Day post months ago, and what a bust! 5 hits in two days, no comments, and I figured because it was an announcement for a fake Apple camera that would revolutionalize photography, I thought that Apple fans and the people who read my camera stuff reviews would show up. The joke was on me this year. Glad to see you got a good turnout and nobody’s holding any grudges!

  2. Wow LA, I knew you adored me, but this takes it to the whole next level. You really have family here though, don’t you. You really should visit me if you ever come out here. Does your family’s church really have a cabin at Falls Creek? I went there once. To Falls Creek that is.

    Okay, this is the real deal. I feel horrible about the joke. Kind of. Less horrible than yesterday. It is funnier today. Regardless, you are welcome to attempt to get me back. Joe is going to try. You two should probably team up, cause I’m so much more of an advanced prankster than you are. As far as the thousand dollars, why don’t you use it to find someone who will listen to you crying? There have got to be some desperate people out there who don’t mind wasting a few hours on a cry baby.

    Seriously, okay, more seriously than the last time I implied seriousness, I almost called the whole thing off because everyone was being so heartfelt and compassionate. That would have been the first time I have ever backed down from a prank I started. Anyway, you all are some of the most wonderful people I have ever met. Like I’ve told a few others, it really has helped me feel a lot less cynical toward humanity in general. So, I’m sorry LA. I never meant to hurt you. Please don’t cry for me Argentina, or is it “cause she’s a heartbreaker, dream taker, love faker…”

  3. Just so you know, everything I said in the comments in reference to any of the times I asked questions about hoarding, or secrets, or whatever; was totally true. I often hinted that the whole thing was a joke too. Most of what I had conversations with people about, was really serious, and I hate to think that I have betrayed anyone’s trust. The overall consensus seemed to be that no matter what, it was okay to talk about it. Those statements were actually what kept me from stopping this a week or two ago. I think that throughout this thing, even if it was ultimately a joke, I was working through some true feelings, and I like to think that some of you were too. Anyway, I really am sorry if I hurt anyone.

  4. You got me! Cream pie right in the face! This is what I get for being a new follower. It won’t happen again, I’m wise to you now! And to top it off I gave you some of my best advice & even got tough with you & that’s very hard for me to do (snicker). Keep looking over your shoulder, you never know when I’ll get you back . . .

    • Sorry, but I’m glad you want revenge too. That is going to be fun. You did give some wonderful advice, and even though I am not a hoarder, I can use pretty much everything people have suggested to work on problem areas, like the desk, and not so obvious problems, like cleaning out some of the clutter of my mind.

  5. Well the comments have cracked me up as much as the post. Course being a secret hoarder myself, I’m not sure how clean I should come – something about the grammar of that…mmmh. But bring it on hobbler, and we can all benefit from your pearls.
    I can’t think of anything worse than having to clear out a closet or sorting through some memorabilia I ‘might’ need someday. I read somewhere about having to let the old memorabilia go in order for the new to take its place. But it all seems too brutal.

    • It is brutal. I don’t really have a lot of attachments to stuff, but I really hate getting rid of my kids toys sometimes. I still do it, but it is hard. I am so glad you have enjoyed the comments too. They are from some of my best friends…or at least they used to be. 😉

    • He loved it. 😉 I am not going to do something like that again though. People were just way to caring. Whatever happened to just being jerks who laughed at people’s problems.

  6. OMG, Hobster. You Gobsmacked me, you devilwoman you!!! I totally fell for it, cuz you just kept it up and on and on… I’ll admit, I had a few suspicions, but I thought you were in cahoots w/someone, and when you never fessed up, well… ya got me!!!!
    I bow to your pranksterness. Though I sometimes feel that pranks, in and of them selves are mean (because they take advantage of the unaware prankee), I was really worried you were going to end up admitting something really horrible about yourself.
    Well done. So well done!!!
    No payback from me, just “I am not worthy” bows!!!!!
    love it!!!

    🙂
    janet

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