Parenting: Dog vs. Cat Children

Ok, I think it is about time that someone really analyzed this issue that I am sure every parent faces.

How to tell if your child is a cat or dog person. The following lists some of the definitive traits of each type of child.

Dog Children:

  • Loves to jump into your lap.
  • Needs plenty of time to play outside.
  • Occasionally has an “accident” outside of the designated toileting area.
  • Is always up for a game of catch.
  • Runs excitedly to the door each time the doorbell rings or someone knocks.
  • Chews on random objects.
  • Enjoys pats on the head when they perform well.
  • Is constantly trying to impress you with a new trick they have learned.
  • Stands near your chair and salivates as you eat the last bites of your ice cream.
  • Enjoys taking baths and runs around excitedly after each one.

Cat Children:

  • Would rather approach you about a subject than have you come to them.
  • Enjoys alone time and often wishes they were an only child.
  • Often jumps into your chair the moment you get up.
  • Loves to climb.
  • Sings/cries and walks slowly around your legs when you have a treat they want.
  • Lashes out and tries to appear larger when they feel cornered.
  • Covers/hides any mess that they make.
  • Uses body language to express things, because they don’t want to seem desperate.
  • Enjoys games when they perform surprise attacks on others.
  • Would rather bathe themselves than take an actual bath.

If you are a cat person parenting a dog child, or visa versa, do not panic…both types of children enjoy treats, understand changes is your tone of voice, and want your love. If you are having difficulties in your parenting, please contact your local PETA branch and ask for advice on dealing with certain situations.

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31 thoughts on “Parenting: Dog vs. Cat Children

  1. Mine’s an angry dog, who enjoys making mess every where she goes. Mainly before bedtime, as if it could delay. If she was a dog, I could leave her locked in the house all day, or outside when she got annoying, and no one would bat an eyelid….

  2. LOL, I loved this!!! One of my grandkids HAD to be a dog in his previous life, he loves playing ball so much (and sits alone with the dogs quite often). The other I think was a rat . . .

    Great post, girl.

  3. I don’t fit into ANY one of them (I am taking myself as an example since I don’t have children. Of course). I guess I am a little of both. So that throws me in a Catog–or maybe Docat– category.

  4. Great post but could you carry on with this and do another that includes weasel children? I’m pretty sure one of my brothers fits that category but I’d just like to check my suspicions against an authoritative source.

  5. I keep coming back to your line: It’s just the obvious truth to those with open eyes (in one of your replies above). Turned just a little: The truth is obvious to those with open eyes becomes quite profound. Thanks a bunch for the chew toy for the day…sigh

  6. I will have to ponder this. One is definitely a cat child, but the others are mostly piranha, especially it comes to food, which is commonly stolen and hidden. The one in particular I’m thinking of will get up and run the door every time, too, so maybe she’s a combo. I think the dynamic changes when you have a pack……….

  7. Excellent breakdown. I believe that both Dimples and I are cat people. Although, I favor dogs. Wow. Everything seemed so clear for a minute, and now I’m all muddled again.

    • Well, it is pretty true, so I don’t think they could do much. They might be happy that I am grouping dogs and cats with people. 😉

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