OAA Week 11 (actually week 9 because they are still being held hostage in a building surrounded by poop)


When we left our overanalyzers in week 9, Jerry had surrounded the building in fecal matter and he was holding them at gunpoint. They had overanalyzed the reasons behind Jerry’s actions, and he was beginning to speak:

Jerry: How are you all still alive? The kindest thing I could do at this moment would be to put a bullet through each of your heads. You know they took me to jail a couple of weeks ago right?¬†Because of you! All your freaking out. I know I have problems, but I am nowhere near as messed up as you are…

I’m going to give you each one opportunity to tell me why I should save your miserable lives.

Bob: (freaking out) You should save my life because I am not one of these people! Look, I started this group because my mother was an overanalyzer. I saw the effects of constantly worrying about everything. She couldn’t even sleep at night because she kept thinking about what my dad meant when he said she was losing her mind.

She went from making us Micky Mouse shaped pancakes, to having us make our own pancakes because she didn’t want to somehow suppress our creativity by determining the shape for us. Then she cried because she felt she might be contributing to the child labor problem by having her kids cook. Later she worried about the lack of work ethic we might experience if we didn’t make our own pancakes. I can’t even look at a pancake now without vomiting.

I wanted to help others with the same problem. Life is about so much more than pancakes. I thought I could get people together to talk about the true problem, the overanalysis that runs through their minds. I thought I could help them recognize it, and when they start thinking like that, they could alter their patterns of thought and enjoy life. I realize now that they will never be able to get to that point.

We have had week after week of meetings, and we haven’t even started talking about overanalyzing. We are still talking about everything from Walmart to the price of tea in China. Literally! The price of tea in China! Actually, that might have been in my nightmare.

Anyway, maybe you should kill me. All I have wanted to do is to make a difference, and I am obviously not going to be able to do that, so go ahead and kill me Jerry. Might as well.

Sue: Don’t say that Bob, you have made a difference in my life! I’ve been dreaming about you too.

Jill: He said “nightmare” Sue. Big difference.

Jack: Actually, there is not that much difference between a nightmare and a dream. Really, the only difference is the feelings that they evoke. Well, they can influence changes in your heart rate, and blood pressure might be different too. But, if you had a really good or exciting dream, your heart rate would probably equal that of a nightmare. Unless it was one of those dreams where you are flying, which should cause a rapid heartbeat, but for whatever reason in your dream it doesn’t…

Joe: Can I have my phone back Jerry?

Bill: Look man, I’m just as freaked out as you are by these extraterrestrials.

Jerry: Can’t you all shut up for 5 minutes? Alright Bob, I won’t kill you yet. You might as well hear the other sob stories. You…your turn…

TO BE CONTINUED… ūüėČ

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Bedtime Stories: Feeding Monsters


There once was a pretty girl. She listened to her teachers and her parents. She kept her room clean and she played the piano well. All in all, great kid. She loved to brush her long¬† blond hair. As she … Continue reading

OAA: Week 10


When we left our overanalyzers last week:

“Door swings open – Jerry stumbles in, wine in one hand, a handgun in the other –

Jerry: Nobody move or say one word. This place is surrounded by fecal matter and my friend, who’s outside with my cart, will light that shit on fire if I give the signal. I have some things I want to say to you wackos…J

TO BE CONTINUED…”

Bob: No need to be angry Jerry…we are just regular people, trying to help each other.

Sue: I gave you a snack bar Jerry! Remember? Was it expired or something? I had it in my purse for a while, but I wouldn’t have given it to you if I knew it was bad…

Jill: Shut up Sue

Bill: Hey man, I’m on your side. I have known these people were freaks all along. It doesn’t take a genius to see that they are all part of the grand scheme to get us into the alpha receptor squadron after they exchange our DNA with that of an alien.

Jack: Woah, hold on Jerry You don’t want to make any rash decisions. I know that you probably have a long history of being abused by members of society in general. You also were probably abused by your parents or an older sibling. I am not sure how you ended up homeless, but if it was due to drug abuse, we all have problems. There is no need to take your frustrations out on anyone else. If you would like, come sit down with us and we can talk about ways that we could help you become a better person. Not that there is anything wrong with you. Well, other than the fact that you are holding us hostage and that you surrounded this building in fecal matter. How did you even manage that? Did you and your friends save it for this moment? That really is a lot of crap…

Joe: (Is attempting to text 911, when Jerry sees his phone and takes it.

Jerry: How are you all still alive? The kindest thing I could do at this moment would be to put a bullet through each of your heads. You know they took me to jail a couple of weeks ago right?¬†Because of you! All your freaking out. I know I have problems, but I am nowhere near as messed up as you are…

TO BE CONTINUED AGAIN…SORRY…I thought I should post this because technically I should have posted it yesterday, then I reread it and I really haven’t even started with what I was wanting to say, so I thought I would continue it again and take my time writing the next part so I don’t overanalyze whether or not I should post it, then I thought “really, I could just go ahead and post this”…

Trifextra: Leap


Trifextra:

Forty-three years ago today, Neil Armstrong became the first person to ever walk on the moon.¬† In celebration of Moon Day we want you to write 33 words about someone who took a giant leap.¬† It can mean whatever you’d like, just make sure you write exactly 33 words.

When do you realize you are out of options?

Planes crashing.

Smoke.

Heat.

Building moaning.

People screaming.

Scent of desperation.

Choices ending.

Glass breaking.

Man leaping.

Towers falling.

No good options.

Encompassing death.

Song of my life/night/day/what is this?


If you had told me at the beginning of this year that I would do the things that have already happened by July 21 I would have said that you were crazy.

Sometimes comfortable…other times not so much…

Pink Floyd Comfortably Numb Lyrics

Songwriters: WATERS, ROGER / GILMOUR, DAVID JON
Hello,
Is there anybody in there?
Just nod if you can hear me
Is there anyone home?
Come on
Now
I hear you’re feeling down
I can ease your pain
Get you on your feet again
Relax
I’ll need some information first
Just the basic facts
Can you show me where it hurts?
There is no pain you are receding
A distant ship’s smoke on the horizon
You are only coming through in waves
Your lips move
But I can’t hear what you’re saying
When I was a child
I had a fever
My hands felt just like
Two balloons
Now I’ve got that feeling once again
I can’t explain
You would not understand
This is not how I am
I… Have become comfortably numb
O.K.
Just a little pin prick
There’ll be no more aaaaaaaah!
But you may feel a little sick
Can you stand up?
I do believe it’s working
Good
That’ll keep you going through the show
Come on
It’s time to go
There is no pain you are receding
A distant ship’s smoke on the horizon
You are only coming through in waves
Your lips move
But I can’t hear what you’re saying
When I was a child
I caught a fleeting glimpse
Out of the corner of my eye
I turned to look but it was gone
I cannot put my finger on it now
The child is grown
The dream is gone
I… Have become comfortably numb

My second favorite f’d up drug


*If you have not told me your opinion on my suicide post, please visit it and tell me your viewpoint. http://wp.me/p1Cvgh-1tl

I am a druggie. For real. I take lots. Some I like, others not so much. My favorite drug was showcased last night on World News with Diane Sawyer, but it helps other people feel great. It helps me feel slightly more like a normal person, than usual and it costs about $800.00 after insurance, so if you feel like assisting a druggie with the one medicine that does more good than harm, feel free to send me money.

The second favorite medication, which, after researching and evaluating I have realized is probably doing much more harm than good is Xanax. Now, you should understand that I have legitimate prescriptions for all the medication I take and valid reasons for taking them. That said, I take some heavy medication. I also take a lot of meds that are very effective at preventing symptoms, and which will probably destroy my liver before I get to the point of being able to legitimately request a lethal dose of yet another drug.

So, my love affair with xanax…

Xanax (alprazolam) belongs to a group of drugs called benzodiazepines. It works by slowing down the movement of chemicals in the brain that may become unbalanced. This results in a reduction in nervous tension (anxiety).

Xanax is used to treat anxiety disorders, panic disorders, and anxiety caused by depression.

Xanax may also be used for purposes not listed in this medication guide. – http://www.drugs.com/xanax.html

Sounds good right? The reason it was prescribed to me was to help the anxiety caused by depression. Woah…stop the bus…Hobbler depressed? I bet you never would have guessed that. That was sarcasm. A depressing sarcastic statement…

Anyway, I’ve been taking it regularly for a while. It helps. I take extra when I’m extra stressed, or extra hormonal. What they don’t list on the medication guide, but you can find all over the internet, is that this drug can cause other problems, like narcissistic tendencies, and lack of empathy. You know, the whole “don’t give a shit” attitude.

Now, we are all writers, narcissism is part of our DNA as we discovered in the “Not a Narcissist” challenge. I still think I have empathy, some situations bring out more of it in me that other situations, but I have lost a lot of the caring that I used to have. I didn’t realize it until recently, as I started researching, then as I got off¬†the medication¬†for a week. And cared enough to cry about some of my uncaring actions over the past few months. It is crazy. Do any of you have any stories how xanax¬†has affected you or a loved one? I feel the need to know a lot more than I previosly had known, and the best source for information is from others who have used this medication, so I would like to know what you think. Thank you all,