The Bionic Woman


Today I get to start the real drug with the clinical trial. I’m excited because I think I’ve been on a placebo for the past few years. Guess I’ll find out soon if I feel any different.

So, as part of this trial every few months I have the full work up, 2 neurologists, like 12 vials of blood taken, my 2 hour infusion, etc. I also have to walk…

So, I’m supposed to walk 20 feet (with a walker), and then I’m supposed to walk any distance for 6 minutes. I couldn’t do either today. Not even 20 feet! It sucks. I tried, but only made it about 13 feet before I had to sit.

I think I’m just having a weak day, in general, but the other part of the problem is spasticity. If you aren’t familiar with that term, it is basically when the muscles override the brain.


A medicine which helps this is called Baclofen. So, I take this in pill form, but today they talked to me about a baclofen pump. It would be surgically implanted in my lower abdomen/side, and a catheter connects it directly to the spinal cord.

It is programmable, so it could deliver more medicine at night, or in the morning, or whatever. Since it goes directly to the spinal cord, drowsiness, and some of the other side effects are minimized.

I’m not sure if I’ll do it or not. They will do a 4 hour test thing similar to a spinal tap, to see how I’d do with it before I schedule surgery.

Anyway, all that to ask:

I already use wheels for legs.
I work out by shocking my muscles with my ems.
I use braces/splints to stretch.
My hip is metal, plastic, and bone.

At what point do I become more machine than human, and doesn’t that make me some kind of superhero?

I’ve got to think of a catchy hero name…

22 thoughts on “The Bionic Woman

  1. I was thinking about maybe Cybergimp or The Incredible Slow Moving and Slightly Wobbling Woman. Just throwing those out there. Free of Charge.

    That sucks. I hope whatever happens it improves your quality of life. I’ll volunteer to wheel you around one day a week. But I only do circles and right turns. Left turns are out of the question.

    • Sounds good Nuke! I’m not sure about the pump, but if it knocked out some of the spasticity, it would really help.

      I think all the things I use, and other handicap accessories are pretty amazing. I am way more interested in them than silly accessories like jewelry and purses, so I guess the disability thing kind of works for me. 😉

    • Oh, and you don’t have to wheel me, I have a powerchair, and a manual, but I’m pretty good at wheeling myself. I should probably take up arm wrestling. My upper half is pretty buff. 😉

  2. Maybe your chair could transform into a flaying machine too, like something from Transformers, or even the car in Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, that could fly and float. The wheels could flip outwards and rockets kick in…

    In general I am pretty disappointed with advances in technology, everything getting miniscule, what happened to visions of the future people had in the 50’s. And all we came up with is the Segway. Really? That’s all we could muster? Why aren’t we all bionic by now.

  3. I would be scared about all the tests you have to go through, hell I’m scared about the tests I have to go through! How about Rollsalotless for a bionic name?

Comments are closed.