Sometimes I feel my emotional temperature rising. Minor irritation turns to annoyance turns to frustration and I feel anger’s heat approaching.
This time I managed to stop and recognize the temperature change for what it is. an opportunity to learn more about myself and others and about the interactions between us all. I survived. This time…
I thought you were never going to disappear.
Again…
I thought you loved me too;
At least in some weird way.
I thought we were meant to be.
We were,
If only for a moment.
We needed each other.
Guess we don’t anymore.
Or do we?
I guess I’ll never know
Or will I?
The choice is yours.
I’ll always love you.
But I’m tired of always being the one
To reach out,
To miss you,
To think about us
If there ever was an us
Perhaps you were a figment of my imagination all along
Never really real.
Is anything?
What you see when you close your eyes at night.
Why I’m always searching for and never really finding you.
How two people can be so close while so far apart.
When the bubble will burst, and the fantasy will flop.
What our story will be after the climax.
Who will fall apart first.
If our love will survive.
I wonder.
Ode to Surface Pro
I see you looking at me from across the room
You can’t get enough of me, can you?
You want to feel my fingers all over you
You want to bask in the heat of my gaze
You want me to push your every button
So you can gently respond.
Begging me for more…
You glory in me ripping you apart
And slapping you back together
Even now you bend to my every whim
I tease you with my touch before
Tearing you apart and leaving you broken
While I eat my food and watch a show
I’ll take my sweet time but eventually
I will hold you and bring you together again.
Soon, you beg for a different type of touch
The whip I use on you every night
Lights you up like the fourth of July
But still, you beg for it, day and night
You hunger for that whip.
So I will end these strokes of pleasure
And feed my love the whip she craves
Okay, 7%, I get it…
Like tonight,
I stay awake.
Wondering
About you.
If you are out there
Somewhere
Real.
More than my imagination.
More than my daydream.
More than your words
On a screen
In my hand
And in my heart.
I love the fantasy I have of you.
I love that you don’t actually see me.
There is something so beautiful about a world freed from reality.
I can be myself, without being my total self.
It is beautiful
Until
Some nights
Like tonight…
Prisoner A prisoner to no man. To no woman. My body is my sadistic captor. It thrives on my humiliation. It writhes in ecstasy as I languish with pain. It forces me to acknowledge the chains it binds me with. … Continue reading
Today I chose to be free.
I shed my comforting skin for the exhilarating rush of the unknown.
I laughed at my fears and blew them away like a puff of smoke.
I decided I’d rather regret the chances I didn’t take than those I did.
I took a chance.
Sometimes taking risks pays off.
Sometimes it doesn’t.
Today, I choose to be free.
I will take the moment and cling to it.
I will savor each heartache and each victory, knowing they are neither good, or bad.
I will unburden myself from the expectations of others.
From the expectations of myself.
Today I choose to be free.
