I don’t understand why people don’t believe in You.
I don’t understand Your timeframe
I ask people every day if they believe in You and most of us do.
But some don’t
Or think that You were merely a good man who got tortured to death.
But You were God. You are God. You love humanity so much You died to save us.
But why do You love people who hate You?
I made you.
I’m the writer of the thing called life.
You are a sock. A beautiful, adventurous, and at times a smelly or damaged vessel.
I am scared that I won’t do enough or the right things.
I’m lying here in bed and haven’t actually slept in a while because my mind won’t stop.
I feel like God is calling me to tell everyone…
What God? What am I supposed to say?
God wants me to tell you that time is short. Shorter for me than for most of you, but the screaming silence in my brain tells me that we need to celebrate the life we have no matter what that life looks like. If you don’t like where your adventure is going choose a new path and do it now. Jesus was God taking on the form of a sock, which is why He never wanted to be worshipped as a God during His short time in our world. He is the best writer I know and wants you to know Him. He loves you and so do I.
I just have to be still and know? That You are God and I am not, so whether I spend my time stressing or smoking pot. The book was actually written by You, so in reality I don’t have shit to do, except to listen to Your quiet prompts if I want to. The choice is each of ours to make.
You wrote us choose your own adventure lives, and gave us the chance to know the Author. This Spirt of God who actually is fucking hilarious and doesn’t care if I say fuck or shit and this is my blog so deal with it. Anyway my mind has again been blown.
Okay, so personally, I like knowing the Author of Life, but fair warning if you get to know this Jesus everyone loves so much. He does a lot of crazy shit! God I love You!
I’m crippled and a professional damsel in distress. Safer buckled into my wheelchair as I roll off a curb and tip the chair on its side or into another predicament.
So thanks for the chair and my unconventional life. The thing that is haunting my mind is actually considering the possibility of being back in a nursing home.
There are benefits to both.
I currently have a handicap accessible apartment in a town I love and a friend staying with me who can help with transfers and other things. However I’m not great at remembering to eat or drink much less healthy food. I also often forget or ignore my medications. I’m not great at taking care of myself.
Nursing homes provide healthy food on a regular schedule and medications given as prescribed. They also help with transfers and other physical needs. However, personal freedom is limited.
I actually think it would be nice to spend a month or so getting taken care of. Especially since I haven’t been taking care of myself well.
I also think that maybe I should just try harder to make myself take care of myself better. But there are many things I can’t do. Like cook healthier and keep my apartment clean. But maybe I could. Just because I haven’t in 39 years and my body can’t bend easily and my mind is scattered…
What do You think God? Your opinion is the one I’m searching for and You seem quiet on this one. I loved experiencing Your magic on my last stay in a home. We were so close there and even though we are still close, I think You like feeding and hydrating me well and seeing my body respond to correct medication levels. I think You like using me to spread Your love to the people that surround me whether at my apartment or in a home. So which is better?
Should I try to stay or try to go, or just be still because You already know that in reality I’m not in control. Help me have peace with how this plays out. And in the meantime I’ll try not to doubt. The Love I know so much about. Your will be done God, whether here or there. I’m so glad You are everywhere.
What if you were given a choice? I could stay on earth and be God’s voice. Witnessing to many sharing the Word. If it hadn’t been that still small voice I heard. “You’re a time traveler and you have three years to make a difference before your body disappears.”
You have given me kids and the man of my dreams. Yet this life is not as easy as it seems. I’m in constant pain and shit on myself. Those things are not things I can put on a shelf to live the beautiful life story You wrote.
As the tears get stuck in my throat, I ponder my choice, should I stay here or go to a magical world I’ll have eternity to know. Should I marry my love and watch my grandkids grow?
But You and I both already know it’s true. When the time comes I choose You.
I recently have been connected to Helping Hands ministries. I’m going to be getting a package together with some of my art and school supplies. My address is 219 N Eastern Apartment A in Moore Oklahoma 73160. Please help God bless His servant.