Reality 


I thought you were never going to disappear.

Again…

I thought you loved me too;

At least in some weird way.

I thought we were meant to be.

We were, 

If only for a moment.

We needed each other.

Guess we don’t anymore.

Or do we?

I guess I’ll never know

Or will I?

The choice is yours.

I’ll always love you.

But I’m tired of always being the one

To reach out,

To miss you,

To think about us

If there ever was an us

Perhaps you were a figment of my imagination all along

Never really real.

Is anything?

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My letter to FaceBook


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Dear F.B.

If I tell you, will you quit asking? My status is eager. You know what is even more weird?

Your obsession with me.

Your emails after the first breakup were…excessive and pushy. The only reason I’m here is because you are holding my friends and family captive.

Look, the reason I avoided you in the first place, was because you were so clingy and needy. You wanted to know everything about me: where I grew up, what music I like, etc. Then you want to follow me everywhere, and you even sent “friends” to track me.

You want me to tell you my whole life story and give you every possible way to contact me.

It’s just plain weird. You need help.

That said, I have to be here on FaceBook for a while, so I hope we can be friends.

Sincerely, Becky
dyingwithstyle.org

Bedtime story: cooties


Once upon a time there was a girl. This girl was lonely, but one day she discovered a hidden world in her backyard.

Inside this world were all sorts of insects, who weren’t really bugs in her mind.

One of them was a roly-poly. Cute, and fun to watch and play with. It was one of the first bugs she really liked.

She also found a grasshopper. At first she didn’t know what to think of it because it jumped right in her face and startled her. Then it hopped around in so many different directions that it was hard to keep up with, but as she followed along, she began to see the beauty in its wings, and the excitement in its life.

She made wonderful friends with a caterpillar that was beautiful, and interesting and would kind of tickle as it climbed on her finger.

Even the spiders enchanted her with their intricate webs and amazing abilities.

Butterflies came through at times and their presence brightened her day although sometimes she wished they had stayed longer.

The backyard became a place she clung to, a place she went when happy, or sad, or anything. She loved it. It was where she felt she could truly be herself.

One day the girl got sick and wasn’t allowed to go out and play. It was a difficult illness and even as she began to heal, she didn’t have the same desire to go to the backyard as she had before.

In her absence, some of the insects died, some had moved on, after all, they were just bugs, and she, just a girl.

When she finally did feel up to going out and playing in the backyard, she couldn’t find all the bugs she had before, but some were still there. She remembered and had missed them, and believe it or not, they had remembered and missed her.

Turns out friends don’t have to look like you or live where you live, or even keep in constant contact. Friends just have to care. Caring can soften even the hardest hearts.

Holiday reminder


As we celebrate the season with our friends and families (you know, the ones who drive us crazy), I thought we could all use a little reminder of what Christmas is really all about.

Bitterness.
Full of pain.
No
Peace in life.
Time wasted on regrets.
No
Freedom.
Hate.
Desire to never
Forgive.

I think I like it better backward.

Forgive.
Never to desire
Hate.
Freedom.
No
Regrets on wasted time.
Life in peace.
No
Pain of full
Bitterness.

Merry Christmas everyone.

Disturbing Trend


Today, while faithfully checking my stats, I noticed a disturbing trend. More people like me that don’t know me than those who do. As I began to over-analyze this strange phenomenon (I am a woman after all), I realized that this could not be because I am less brilliant in person than I am in writing. I also am just as charming, funny, etc. so since it couldn’t be something wrong with me; it must be something wrong with them. With that in mind, here is a list of possible explanations:

  • They can’t read – although this seems improbable, sometimes people hide things that they are ashamed of. For all I know, all my Facebook “friends” are actually 4th graders being paid to write about the daily life of their bosses. (That would also explain some of the spelling errors).
  • They don’t want the publicity of being associated with me – being a celebrity does have a downside; the constant autograph signings, the paparazzi, the photographers, it is no wonder those who know me hide that fact.
  • They are too busy – As we all know, keeping up with all the social media in our lives can be quite demanding. When weighing the options of how to manage their time, it is not surprising that many choose to let the world know where and how they are, as well as other important details like when they last used the restroom, what they had for lunch, etc. and after all that updating, they are probably too exhausted to read a blog.
  • I’m not dying  – Have you ever noticed how popular dying people are? I often think to myself “you would read it if I was dead”. I guess dying people are just more interesting…suddenly people are curious about your thoughts, feelings, and words. It’s a morbid world out there.
  • On the off-chance that my friends either: are reading my blog, don’t realize I had a blog, really do have more important things to do, etc. ………I didn’t mean anything I just said…really, I understand why you can’t devote your time…I was just joking about the 4th grade spelling errors…of course I still love you…

(For all my blog buddies, forget that last point. I have to try to keep some real friends just in case) 😉