What to do when you realize you are an idiot:

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In light of recent events, I am re-posting this as a reminder to myself. First and most importantly; don’t panic. 98.875% of the world’s population will come to this realization at some point in their lives. If you don’t think … Continue reading

12 Days of Christmas: Tattletale Twelve


Does anyone else think the “12 Days of Christmas” song is a little strange? Here are some more realistic lyrics.

Karaoke: (play in the background)

On the first day of Christmas my daughter said to me:

He stuck his tongue out at me.

On the second day of Christmas my daughter said to me:

They are being mean, and he stuck his tongue out at me.

On the third day of Christmas my daughter said to me:

She won’t stop, they are being mean, and he stuck his tongue out at me.

On the fourth day of Christmas my daughter said to me:

He told me a lie, she won’t stop, they are being mean, and he stuck his tongue out at me.

On the fifth day of Christmas my daughter said to me:

It is not fair, he told me a lie, she won’t stop, they are being mean, and he stuck his tongue out at me.

On the sixth day of Christmas my daughter said to me:

She won’t play with me, it is not fair, he told me a lie, she won’t stop, they are being mean, and he stuck his tongue out at me.

On the seventh day of Christmas my daughter said to me:

They will not take turns, she won’t play with me, it is not fair, he told me a lie, she won’t stop, they are being mean, and he stuck his tongue out at me.

On the eighth day of Christmas my daughter said to me:

He grabbed it from me, they will not take turns, she won’t play with me, it is not fair, he told me a lie, she won’t stop, they are being mean, and he stuck his tongue out at me.

On the ninth day of Christmas my daughter said to me:

She isn’t helping, he grabbed it from me, they will not take turns, she won’t play with me, it is not fair, he told me a lie, she won’t stop, they are being mean, and he stuck his tongue out at me.

On the tenth day of Christmas my daughter said to me:

They made a big mess, she isn’t helping, he grabbed it from me, they will not take turns, she won’t play with me, it is not fair, he told me a lie, she won’t stop, they are being mean, and he stuck his tongue out at me.

On the eleventh day of Christmas my daughter said to me:

He said “get out now”, they made a big mess, she isn’t helping, he grabbed it from me, they will not take turns, she won’t play with me, it is not fair, he told me a lie, she won’t stop, they are being mean, and he stuck his tongue out at me.

On the twelfth day of Christmas my daughter said to me:

She called me whiny, he said “get out now”, they made a big mess, she isn’t helping, he grabbed it from me, they will not take turns, she won’t play with me, it is not fair, he told me a lie, she won’t stop, they are being mean, and he stuck his tongue out at me.

Blue Christmas: Last Remake of the Season

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Real Version – Karaoke   I am so blue, blue after Christmas.    Chaos is through, we’re done with the big fuss. Decorations still up, but it’s easy to see    I’m in no mood to, start taking down the tree. … Continue reading

Up On The Housetop: Do it yourself guide.

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Real  Up on the housetop you better not pause    You’re not really Santa Claus. Down through the chimney you might fall    If you put the lights up so tall.   Oh, oh, oh! There you go.   Ow, ow, ow! … Continue reading

Santa Baby (Mom Version)

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If you have not heard this song go to: This Link and hear the real thing first. If you’re familiar with the song, please open this link (or a similar karaoke version of the song) and listen while inserting the following words: … Continue reading

Jingle Bells: And Other Noisy Toys

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Real – These things are better if you sing them to the tune of the real song. Went shopping on Black Fri.    I got a bunch of toys Passed up the drum set my kid wants   Cause I didn’t … Continue reading

Grandma Got Runover By Some Rain Gear: Illustrated Version

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I think this is the favorite out of my remade Christmas songs, so I thought I’d make some pics to go with it. Now, please don’t be too harsh on the drawings, they are just for fun. Real…Karaoke Grandma got … Continue reading