Of course I choose You


What if you were given a choice? I could stay on earth and be God’s voice. Witnessing to many sharing the Word. If it hadn’t been that still small voice I heard. “You’re a time traveler and you have three years to make a difference before your body disappears.”

You have given me kids and the man of my dreams. Yet this life is not as easy as it seems. I’m in constant pain and shit on myself. Those things are not things I can put on a shelf to live the beautiful life story You wrote.

As the tears get stuck in my throat, I ponder my choice, should I stay here or go to a magical world I’ll have eternity to know. Should I marry my love and watch my grandkids grow?

But You and I both already know it’s true. When the time comes I choose You.

Where is the freaking “off”button?


I want to write

I want to think

And I kind of want

A nice stiff drink

I need some time to figure out

The things that I keep thinking about

I know what I need but I’m really not sure

What it is I keep searching for

How am I supposed to find

The power button on my weary mind?

Trusting God


Me – It has been a problem for so long!

Him – I know, I’ve been there the whole time.

Me – When are You going to fix it?

Him – Just a little bit longer, I’m only making us stronger.

Me – The deadline is almost here.

Him – I know.

Me – I thought I trusted You.

Him – Point made.

Me – Touché Lord. I’m still scared.

Him – Be still, and know that I am God. You can always completely trust the One who loves you so much He died for you. I’ve got this.

Me – After a day or two of continuing to stress – Okay, thank You God. I’m still scared, but I see Your hand. Making me into the human You want me to be. Help me to trust Your plan.

Him – Hold my hand. I’ll walk you through it.

Let’s get honest


I don’t know how to properly convey

Exactly what I am trying to say

So many questions are filling my mind

The truth might be something I never find

What exactly is the point

Of all this time spent on this joint

And in a land of endless time

Won’t we get bored without crime?

Forever seems so very long

On the flip side,

Life is amazing

Every second is full of intensity when you get outside of your head

There you soak in the warmth of the soft fluffy blanket you’re holding

There you notice the intricate patterns in the materials surrounding you

There you breathe in and feel the rise of your stomach

There you realize forever is a moment

To love the ones you love

Meeting friends and family

Who have been long waiting up above

But it’s okay their Saviors Lord

Has given us His Holy Word

From it we know we won’t get bored

It is a powerful two edged sword

He made a place for us to be

The humans He made and free

From hates red glare

And deaths icy touch

He loves us all so very much

He made a place for us to find

And finally be unstuck from our mind

So please learn about this Christ

Who gave us all His very life

To be with us and finally see

The humans He made us to be

Trying to write


Is like trying to breathe. Writing happens whether I want it to or not. Sometimes my fingers take charge of my brain and the letters form words and I feel like I’m flying but I stay in my chair ignoring the pain in my derrière. To bleed these words onto the page. To watch my fingers dance across their stage. I wonder what they’re about to type. Sometimes it’s scary but exciting too. Wondering what these two thumbs will do. I’m writing these words on the screen on my phone. We have such amazing technology including these gadgets which absorb much of life. The “sound of silence” found in our devices. A beautiful marvel and useful tool. A deadly distraction and a lethal fuel. Bitter seduction and two edged sword cutting and painful. Yet freeing and true. I guess the power is up to you. For now I will write and let the words drip. Speaking in silence these letters on lips. Empty my feelings, quiet my mind. Breathe in and breathe out. Stillness is mine to find.

Quick question


Why is the idea of God more unreasonable to many people than the Big Bang? That idea seems much more silly to me than the idea of our very detailed and complicated universe being designed by a great Designer.

He made this game of life and each of us characters. We are trapped in this very real universe which is actually just a thought of a Designer called God. The one rule He gave Himself was to never mess with free will.

The first few hundred humans decided to do Life the hard way and be jerks to each other. After life had been going on for a while, God realized humanity, (all of us mini gods who think we control life) were mostly ungrateful jerks, so he wiped the world clean with the flood and started again with different humans who ended up becoming jerks so God gave them a few rules. Unfortunately the rules weren’t enough to stop humans, so He made a plan.


Make Himself into a human, go into the game and tell the characters that they don’t have to worry and treat others bad. Life is amazing and we get to love it and each other and we should love God because He made it all and even became human so that all of us would know that He, God, knows it’s hard to be human. It is for all of us, but it will be over one day.


When we die, we are either trapped in the game as ghosts, or we go meet the Designer and we find out this reality was just a thought.


It helps if you know the Designer but He gives us control of that. Have fun playing your roll. Recognize the beauty in the world and each other. Love is the answer.

Restless mind in a lazy body


When I’m lazy, as some days are, I stay at home or don’t go far.

My mind can’t stop and my body won’t go, so onto social media I flow.

Sometimes I rhyme and then I might stop.

I let the words fill up the white space on the page, and as I do so, my breathing slows. It’s like a tap, dripping my thoughts.

Drip – why am I so lazy?

Whisper – Sometimes your brain can’t choose what to do so it chooses to do nothing.

Drip – How can I do things I’m not capable of doing?

Whisper – Depend on My power.

Drip – what if I am not doing enough?

A whisper – even non doing is doing with the right mindset. Simply be.

Drip – I’m afraid I might let you down.

Whisper – I have not given you the spirit of fear.

Drip- what if I can’t do it all or do it well?

The quiet whisper from the land without time, you already did.

Drip – I love you Lord.

Whisper – I loved you first.

An Empty Sock


An empty sock, is what you were.
A lifetime of memories no more than a blur.
The years of miracles, the lessons you share.
Time never ending, yet His end is near.
The art of a life spent dying to save.
The Passion was only one thing that You gave.
You gave up Your dignity, throne, and pride.
You became a human, got tortured, and died.
Shedding tears of blood,the Spirit had to let you go.
Loneliness enveloped you in hell’s fire glow.
Simply a sock when the Spirit was gone,
But as many know, His Spirit lives on.
One day even His body comes back,
Until then, let’s pick up some slack.
Take care of each other.
Love and love back.

Your best life


I’m in a wheelchair. With MS. Sometimes I poop on myself. I have a catheter, so I’m constantly peeing into a bag. I have consistent pain and my cognition is rapidly declining.

I’m also on social security which pays me to sit around. Which works well because I see walking as overrated. I love my life of dancing around town in my wheelchair and celebrating the amazing life I have.

It is also a very painful and frustrating life, but you don’t appreciate the good if you don’t get the bad. They both are there. Changing you perspective changes everything.