Blocked


writers-block1

I promise that I really tried

To take my readers on a ride.

To keep them spellbound with suspense

To write in conflict and keep it tense.

I tried to write some sad stuff too

Make them believe it could be true.

Tried to write some witty verse

But I must be under some sort of curse

Because each time I start to write,

The words refuse to come into site.

I’m left staring at a blank page

More annoyed than full of rage.

I simply want to write a bit.

This feeling makes me want to quit.

So instead of trying to get it done.

I’ll write a poem just for fun.

So there! You mental blocking jerk!

Writing shouldn’t be so much work.

What to do when you realize you are an idiot:


In light of recent events, I am re-posting this as a reminder to myself. First and most importantly; don’t panic. 98.875% of the world’s population will come to this realization at some point in their lives. If you don’t think … Continue reading

Love


I love the moonlight, and long for it to caress my naked skin.

I love intelligent conversations with anyone.

I love orgasms. Don’t you?

I love that feeling you get when flirting.

I love the taste of fresh pineapple.

I love dreaming.

I love being capable of doing things.

I love the sound and smell of rain.

I love dancing in my wheelchair (now if I could just come up with some better moves).

I love being valued.

I love the way my kids light up my life.

I love being the town cripple.

I love being able to cry without judgement.

I love words, and the fact that they can reach across miles and touch your very soul.

I love baths.

I love weed a little too, just saying.

I love the adventures my mind goes on, even though my body doesn’t cooperate.

I love Blue Bunny Birthday Party ice cream.

I love writing something that gets me wet.

I love the taste of freedom.

Lots of fish…


blue-fish-6723

Once upon a time there was a fish.

One fish in the sea of millions.

The thing that makes this fish tale different,

Is that this fish didn’t know  how to swim.

She tried.

She tried so hard.

To be like the other fish.

To “fly” through the water.

The other fish made it look easy.

The same water that lifted everyone else,

Was suffocating, heavy, immobilizing.

A few fish tried to help.

To teach her how to swim

No use.

She couldn’t swim.

Eventually she stopped trying.

She wasn’t strong enough.

At least she wasn’t in her mind’s eye.

So she drifted.

So she fell.

So she drowned.

But don’t be sad…

There are lots of fish in the sea.

A few last minute Christmas gift ideas for husbands:


Write him a book: The great thing about this idea is that you don’t actually have to write a whole book…your husband probably won’t read it anyway. Just write a few pages, dedicate the book to him, and then paste those pages into some romantic book like “Lady and the Tramp”. A new book cover and you are ready to go.

The Sleep Inducer: What! You haven’t heard of this? Well here is the link: http://wp.me/p1Cvgh-4b

Coupon booklet: If you have children they have probably made you a few of these, but basically you just write a few “coupons” for housework or other things. The great thing about this gift is that after Christmas, your hubby will leave this book lying around somewhere. Before he gets a chance to cash the coupons in, just hide the book. Your husband will not want to get into a fight about how he could have lost the book you worked so hard on, so he will probably not even mention that it is missing.

A blow up doll: Not that kind…you and your dirty minds. One of those things that you blow up and then punch…it’s like a punching bag, but cheaper and easier to wrap. They come in all sorts of characters like Mickey Mouse and Sponge Bob. Your hubby needs something that he can take his frustrations out on and it can be a great workout.*

Bows: One of the great things about Christmas is that you can slap a bow on something and it suddenly becomes a gift. Bows can be conveniently stuck to almost anything that your husband seems to enjoy…guns, tv, money, body parts, etc.

Merry Christmas and Good Luck!

*These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA.