Richard Thomas Exclusive!


There is no past. My heart was ripped from me in a rush of flashing lights and sticky yellow tape. There is no future. Vision would require hope, and that stealthy whore eludes me at every turn. So I float in the ether, pasty skin crawling with regret, eyes gouged out by my own shaking hands.

Richard Thomas, author, editor, and friend who is legally obligated not to sue me if I run his foot over with my wheelchair, chose the lines above from his book for you, my readers.

This book is going to be good. Buy it here:

download

If you have the audacity to not take my word for it, read reviews here:

The Horror Bookshelf, Entropy, Crime Fiction Lover, Matt Pucci, Splatterhouse 5. I have more links if you still aren’t convinced.

If I were you, right after I bought the book, I’d go to the following link and follow Richard’s blog: 

http://whatdoesnotkillme.com/2015/05/26/disintegration/

Bound by you


  

I’m captured by you.

Bound by you.

Tortured by you.

Turned on by you.

Thrilled by you.

Hurt by you.

Consumed by you.

You make me laugh.

You make me cry.

You sicken me.

You control me.

I can’t put you down.

I can’t escape you.

I can’t erase you.

I am yours.

This second, this minute, this hour.

Until I turn the last page.

I am your reader.

Slipping away


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I can almost feel it; my sanity.

It’s something I can touch, but only briefly, and even then quite I can’t grasp it. I don’t know exactly when I began to lose my mind, but it is more gone then here now.

I’m Becky. That crazy girl in a wheelchair who rides around town dancing.

I made a sign for the front of my chair that says “will someone please buy me a louder speaker?”

Think that’s too forward? I went around a busy intersection in town, and danced with that sign, and my others, about 7 times just circling around the intersection.

I do believe I’ve lost my mind.

Who am I? Part of me can see reality, that I am a mother, with a physical disease, who is also bipolar.

Part of me reads what is on my signs, and the million other quotes I look at. That part believes it’s true, that you do need to be the change you wish to see in the world – Ghandi, That life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all – Helen Keller. That no great mind has ever existed without a touch of madness – Aristotle, etc.

So I live it, I want to see people dance, so I dance. I love adventures, so I dare to do things differently. Maybe madness isn’t something to run away from.

I feel like I’m in the middle of two realities.

#1st reality – I’m a single mother with a disease, I need to provide for and take care of my kids, the house, dogs, etc. I really need a job and money.

2nd reality – I am seriously trying to change the world. To get people outside, to get people to dance, to start recognizing the value we each can and do bring to the table, whether an ordinary writer, or an artist who happens to be in a chair with wheels, or an ordinary guy who notices and helps the crippled girl stuck somewhere. Heroes are all around and even inside of us.

But this particularly insane hero is stuck. In between the two worlds. I have to find a way to make money. If you have any ideas how I could do that, while dancing like a fool, please tell me. I shouldn’t have to turn my back on changing the world to make change at some store where I could fit as a cashier with my wheelchair. Please help me figure out how to bridge the gap.

My kind of autograph


Ok, so some of the agents and publishers had a q&a time and I asked something like at what point in the writing of my manuscript should I start pitching it? The overwhelming answer was wait until it is completed. 

So, my problem was that I didn’t have a finished manuscript, but the conference was now, and I have an idea for a book I think would be a perfect fit for Dark House Press.

My solution? I asked for and received Richard Thomas’ autograph on this:

  
I told him I wanted him to remember the crazy crippled girl who made him sign a waiver. I’ll send a copy of it with my book when I finally finish it. 

Guess what?


 The most incredible thing happened to me today. I met a guy at Starbucks who does a radio show, and he wants to do about a 15 minute on-air interview with me!

I’m beyond excited! For those of you who don’t know, I’m trying to change the world. Dyingwithstyle.org is my website where you can read all about it.

Anyway, it should be within the next few weeks, and there should be a podcast of it, so I’ll share it here after it’s done, and on my site. 

It’s for missionsradio.org, which is basically a site promoting all sorts of world-changing people and organizations from around the world. I seriously can’t stop smiling. 

What to do when you realize you are an idiot:

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In light of recent events, I am re-posting this as a reminder to myself. First and most importantly; don’t panic. 98.875% of the world’s population will come to this realization at some point in their lives. If you don’t think … Continue reading

Happily Ever After


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So many people have an idea of what “happily ever after” looks like. I realized tonight that my “happily ever after” doesn’t look anything like the typical hopes and dreams most people have.

Some of us are cut from a different mold, and maybe, just maybe, it is okay to want something different. I will always value the fairy tale from a literary standpoint, and I am hopeful for those who choose to follow that path. 

My own story will have a much different ending, hopefully still filled with excitement and adventure, but I don’t want a fairy tale prince (or princess for that matter).

I think some people are meant to be alone, and I honestly think I’m one of them. Why should that be a sad thing? 

I want passionate lovers to color the pages of my book, but I want to be the author of the story. I want whirlwind romances to sweep me off my feet, but am I wrong for hoping they don’t linger too long?

I’m a writer. Maybe not the best writer, but can a fairy tale still exist without the romantic “and they lived happily ever after” at the end?  Continue reading